gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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