So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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