are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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