I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
