he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize