Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
