Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
