The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize