i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
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Mom said you looked used
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo