Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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