Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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