so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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