dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
