its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
