he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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