I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
