She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Randomize
