whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
