Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got carded by a ten year old.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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