chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just lost a toe
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize