But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Randomize