I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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