wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
