We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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