i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
