A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
