I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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