He is like the real live version of the state fair..
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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