So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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