we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
