if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Everything about him screamed your future.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
