Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
