he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize