She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize