The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
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This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
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You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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