It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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