dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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