I didn't shave. On purpose
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
