These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
