wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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