my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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