You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
