my room smells like sperm. sweet.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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