well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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