their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Your penis caused this!
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
