my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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