Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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