I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
