they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
