Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
