my soul wont recognize me after tonight
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
